Many of us blog, right? We blog about our lives, what happens on TV, political developments, film reviews, headaches, social issues, songs, poetry, PMS, short stories (with no memorable characters and stupid endings) and much
more. There are categories you can pick from and domains you can host your blog up on. You can make friends and enemies over simple posts like, let’s say, how Always is better than Whisper. You can share your (unasked for) opinion on anything under the Sun. Including the future of the twin sons I haven’t had yet.And since you’ve accomplished soul draining tasks like double clicking on icons, saving links and sending emails to people who don’t want to hear from you, you also must have noticed that there are fascinating blazons of bloggers. Yes? What is it you say? You haven’t? I’ll show you.
Kasana Sets Out On a Blog-Journey:
This is me on any given day. Things grow in my hair. From apples, lollipops, Anglo-Saxon babies to crosses, shrapnels and nuclear bombs, my hair has it all. I listen to metal while surfing the internet; it gives me perception. So when I’m going through blogs as a phantom reader (because my keyboard sets itself on fire as soon as the comment-page shows up), I have Slayer playing in my ears, and it’s not very exciting to read about how your friends no longer deserve your loyalty after ditching you at the cafeteria, okay? Which brings me to the first blogger-type. The Ever-Distressed Bimbo Blogger With the Visually Disturbing Pink/Yellow/Purple Theme:
I have nothing against this kind even if they love Lady Gaga and endure her music. I actually admire the level of tolerance and valour they show in the face of whatever the hell she is. I also think it’s really cute they posted their kitten’s 4587th picture. But I don’t share my comments on their blogs because, believe me, their lives are SUCH a mess, you know? Their, like, pinky nail broke last Tuesday and, oh my gosh, the pain is just so like, painful? Bloggers like sweetheart57 and angeltearslava will always haunt me. Always.The Political Thinker And His Political Thoughts On His Political Blog:
You guys have won my respect. Not only do you blog about mind-screwing issues and delve into the messy politics of a country like ours, you also find the time and energy to post your thoughts on sports (our country will never play/win in), television series (our country will never get a shot at) and global issues (our country has nothing to do with). It’s just so very draining, I mean. And God forbid if you ever decide to comment on a simple, boring blogger’s post. Like mine.
Cute Blogger Mommy (And Her Burning Kitchen):
Cute blogger mommies are cute and I love tautological statements. Blogging about pregnancy, diapers, flushes, cramps and mood swings so gracefully. But the thing is, I’ll be happier if you women paid attention to cooking the meal instead of thinking about its prospective glory as a post with pictures. And this is not chauvinism so shut your maternal mouth. Okay? Wonderful! (Your baby’s crying, BTW.)Gamer Blogs:
Dude. His life revolves around his PSP, PS3, computer and soda. That’s all there is to it.
Okay. I respect privacy and I expect the same. But sometimes I just don’t understand why the hell people create a blog in a place where everything is accessible with a single click. Your blog is private, right? Then why is it on the internet? Why don’t you buy a diary with a pretty little blue ribbon and a plastic lock? Oh, so you want a few selected people reading it? That’s nice. I mean, it’s like an e-diary circulated among people you think care about you and your musings. Really precious. But do you actually think that they’re the only person reading your private blog? What if I’m sitting next to them, sneaking glances at your virtual hideout? What if they turn to me and gush with joy, “Oh oh oh! This is the part where she finds her boyfriend making out with a pregnant moose! Haw haw haw!” and what if I take screenshot of it? Not so stealthy, are we now?The Random Cute Funny Guy-Blogger:
He’s cute and he’s funny and I’m getting bored. This blogger has a few good jokes to share with his readers and his snappy little anecdotes are ever-amusing but for Christ’s sake, will he ever take a shower? What is with that display picture? Is that … his … oh. Wow.The God Forsaken Obscure Blogger:
I get it. You read Sylvia Plath and Mouth To Mouth and you love to listen to Snow Patrol and Inara George in endless loops. You realized that romance is over-rated and you’ve been emotionally abused by everyone including the milk man when you were 15. Now you’re 16. Amazing, I know. But for the sake of whatever you deem precious, please stop pooping all over your blog about shit that won’t ever make sense even if a supernatural literary cognoscenti decided to decipher your gut-wrenching cryptology. Okay? Get off the computer and do your homework.
82 thoughts on “Blogger Specimen, Ladies and Gentlemen”
Best thing to wake up to in the middle of the night (it’s 4 AM) … Hahaha.
Since this was somewhat country specific – at least for the politico type – why are those guys white? And why are you white?
Brown pride !
Yaar, jani. Jani, baat suno. Jani, bitmap mai brown scale ko darken/lighten kartay waqt mera janaza nikal jata hai. Isliye please, jani, come on. Please to come on, jani.
Woah ! Jani shani choro. I will have to take you to task now.
I was merely gauging you response, you will hear more from me on teetar.
YO, AT LEAST OBSCURE BLOGGER HAS PRETTY HAIR.
YO. I don’t care.
Awesome Post … going to share with my bloggy friends :)
[ BTW good time to post it though :D I really need some SMILES ]
Glad it made you smile, Wasif.
Obscure Blogger is my favorite because there are always part of a community that “gets” it. It’s like everyone is speaking in a code I don’t understand and then sixty-five people post comments about good and deep the writing was. I’ve yelled “What?!” at my computer in cases like this before. The bewilderment was just too great for me to endure without making some kind of pained sound.
I am also fearful that I may fall into the Cute Funny Guy-Blogger category, except I’m not cute or funny.
Posky, man. Let’s stalk your cool blog. And yeah, you’re right about the obscure blogger. I used to be one. Except I had no blog back then.
I think those are just called mentally spastic youths.
Feel free to stalk away, just keep posting too.
lol! made my day
& i love the sketches!…esp your hair.
Yay! Thank you for the compliments.
Love the drawings!
Glad you do, Maha.
What about the ones who write a post every 2 months
Or so and consider themselves bloggers *whistles and looks
Looks towards the ceiling while shifting pupils from left to right likewindsheild wipers*
Clever, you are.
Zabardast ! I love how the awesomeness of your drawings is growing exponentially. I also love horses,but that’s a different story.
MAN, I LOVE BABY TURTLES.
LOL! I read this first thing in the morning! Had me laughing! I’m wondering where I fit in! :D
And the images are cool!
I think you’re the cute harmless blogger who isn’t mentioned here because that type seldom bugs me.
Kasana, i will pay you to draw me these images.
and oh, the post is bloody brilliant :P more on google baatein.
Yaar, aap bohut nice hain. Yaar.
good one, mehreen.
OH HI. You’re that adorable mommy blogger! Must check your blog again.
How did the stick Kasana get to that much hair from being bald a few days ago??
PS: Growing apples in your hair is a cool way to get free food.
In my defense,
I blog without setting anyone on fire.
… Clever. :rubs chin:
hahahha OMG that made my morning!!! thats truly gem!! loved every moment of it!!love u mehreen (no homo btw)
Sending a no-homo hug your way, Mehak.
Mohtarmah u r one hell of a blaggar, but u haven’t done justice to the funny guy blaggar, its more of a funny gay blaggar!
Loved every moment of it. <3
Awesome illustrations!!! You’ve put a lot of efforts in there .. nice work!
Absolutely hilarious! Totally enjoyed it!
oye! what about the loud Amreekan Pakistani blogger specimen called kasana? :P
Dunno watchu talkin’ about, man.
Haha, this was really funny and cool at the same time. It makes me wonder which which category I fall in?…or am I a category unto myself?
Your hair looks bad ass btw.
Funny!!! Lol its good to be shown the mirror once in a while!!!
Ooooops beizattiiiiiii!:( =P *heaves the last,cold sigh and swoons away*
AND BTW, WHY ARE YOU SO FREAKING AWESOME??? :d Love the happenings in ur hair-o-sphere too! :D
WAQAI waise. WAQAI. *fervently prays she doesn’t fit into any category*
I LOOOOVE the illustrations =D
You missed out the crazy sports blogger.. :P But great read as usual!
This is hilarious.
I love your art. It’s amazing. :)
I’d never want to be in the perpetually depressed bloggers. :p
Haha. Look who’s talking. /:)
it’s posts like these that keep the political bloggers sane enough to come back to the keyboard another day.
Keep kicking Kasana.
Oh & since you’re the only other Pak blogger who’s well and truly well versed in the way of 4chan (cough *fapping?*) whatever happened to our plan to start Pak-Chan – The Ultimate Desi Imageboard.
WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING, MAN.
As soon as I’m done with whatever keeps me busy. Such as: everything. Etc etc.
how can u play such magic with ms paint? hilarious post btw.. :D
Hahahaha! Love it! You know you could be the brown theoatmeal.com with your humor and hilarious drawings :D
Love your drawings. Love your brain. Seriously.
Hahaha, loved it!
every time i read your blog i fall a little more in love with you. Not cause your blog is amazing( we both know that aint true) but every time i read it im convinced your exactly the kind of person i wana be with.
Man, your taste in women is bad.
what can I say….the heart wants what the heart wants
Yello, purple, pink theme? ehem. ME? =s I guess so. But I hate ladygaygay.
Awesome post! Love the drawings!
“But for the sake of whatever you deem precious, please stop pooping all over your blog about shit that won’t ever make sense even if a supernatural literary cognoscenti decided to decipher your gut-wrenching cryptology” … made my day
haha you have the cutest drawings! wo0~
Keep it up :)
thank you … I needed that … your posts are always a treat… specially the ones with pictures!!!
keepem coming…I loved the private blogs bit…
good one. cute blogger mommy i like the best. just wondering, what cateogry do you fall in? im-too-cool blogger?
No. I’m a loser-blogger.
I’m strangely offended, amused and maybe a little bit flabbergasted.
Oh, and great post by the way. It’s good to see you can still blog like you don’t give a shit, when you’ve got so much to care about elsewhere.
Ah yes, the greatly awaited post on Mubashar L. Hmm, strange, can’t find his name anywhere.
Sent him an email. Got a sorry-ass reply. You can shut up now.
I can shut up now.
Whoa, easy with the words, lady.
I can shut up now, yaar. Chup kar lo sab. Mujhe sherbet chahiye.
I fall in the “The Random Cute Funny Guy-Blogger” category..
Not that completely though… but I am tending towards to it. I am not that cute or funny.. but I am random and a guy…
So what category do you fall in?
I am a loser blogger.
Jhoot hai yeh sub.
Acha, sahe hai. Ajao, chai piyani. Challo? Nahi.
I must be a god forsaken obscure blogger, eh? :D
we gon’ party tonight
Kasana you are hillarious!
Amazing blog Kasana. Out of a handful of the blogs Ive read,yours is by far the best! :D Keep it up!
Haaha! i have seen all these types. blogging can be fun until the wrong person reads it an make a wrong interpretation of it and spreads wrong rumors, bah!
oh well… nice blog :)